It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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