I'm lost and stupid without you.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
