Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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