Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
