i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Randomize
