i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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