I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
