Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
