did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
