I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
