We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
