Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
