i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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