sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
