Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
