I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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