Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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