You really coming over, don't trick.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
