wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
