He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize