She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
