I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I just found puke in my bra..
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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