What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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