Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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