Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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