i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
