the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
