Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
17 year olds will be the death of me.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize