what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
