Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
