I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
