i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
