the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
