so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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