Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
do nipples grow back?
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