You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Randomize
