Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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