look no pants
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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