This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
