I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
