He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
