She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
