I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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