Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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