Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
