just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Randomize
