We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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