When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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