I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
In America we eat man semen.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I yelled at your uterus for you.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
