You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Randomize
